RON CARPENTER RELATIONSHIP BUILDERS

CHECK YO SELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YO SELF

Most of the time, we bring people into our lives that ultimately don’t last mostly because we don’t know what suits us. It doesn’t help that we live in a culture that discourages us to be by ourselves, become self-aware and discover our own identity.

Being self-aware means knowing yourself, your likes and dislikes. Being self-aware helps you recognize the things you value, your boundaries, feelings, and those things I like to call non-negotiables.

Non-negotiables are those things in life you determine you absolutely will or will not tolerate. If you know that a non-negotiable for you is having children, it wouldn’t suit you to enter into a long-term relationship with someone who adamantly doesn’t want children.

A great way to build self-awareness is to spend time alone. However, our culture has instilled a fear of being alone in each of us, so we settle for bad company as opposed to no company at all. You go on a date with someone you don’t like, someone who repels you, just because you don’t want to be home alone on a Friday night.

If you don’t know any of those things, you’re vulnerable to falling into a momentum trap in a relationship, talking rings, covenant, and marriage.

Relationship Builder Action Step: Singles: Block off regular time weekly with yourself—a date night with yourself¬¬—and use that as a chance to determine your non-negotiables and evaluate your progress towards your life’s goals.