FORGIVENESS FACTOR 2
I struggled for years, being on the ‘outside’, you know, in the outer courts of the temple. I had accepted Jesus at 4, and had an awesome experience with God as my daddy – and then the ‘religious-ness’ began to drive me back and away from God – cause after all, I wasn’t good enough.
Isn’t it amazing what we will accept, especially when we come to know God? Isn’t it amazing how we go right on by LOVE, (who God is) and accept all of our faults as who we are. Hmmm. And is it any wonder that I ended up out in the outer courts – after all, that is where someone like ‘me’ belonged. You know, born out of wedlock, and as such damned forever – religious-mind-set.
Well I remember dreaming of being in the outer court , on my knees, crying, Daddy, I want to come in. I was in front of this big door that was locked and I had tried like forever to get it open, with know success --- but this day I didn’t try anything, I just cried out for God with all my heart – HELP!! ABBA! DADDY! HELP! LET ME IN!! I NEED TO COME IN AND BE WITH YOU! I WANT TO COME IN AND BE WITH YOU FOREVER!!
And surprise! The door opened wide, letting me in, and as I got up and walked through it, amazed, I entered into the throne room. I stood there with my mouth opened and stunned. I got in. How was that possible? I mean how is it I wasted all those years trying to break down the walls and windows. And when that didn’t work, sneaking around trying to slip in so I could get to God.
And finally, after no success I had simply stood outside and cried coming to the end of myself ideas and ways – and the door – the required living way door. Ready to open when I knocked – when I came to the end of myself, and cried out, even in my fear, to God – this is knocking.
Well, you can guess my amazement as I walked into the most radiant, richly furnished and peaceful room, full of the presence of God, and approached the very Throne where I thought I would be yelled at from, and beat up from, and told to leave and never come back.
Surprise! I was welcomed, with all of my lack, I was received with Grace and Mercy, because my ‘way in’ was present, Jesus, my covering, my way in. He was at the right hand of the Throne of God, and I fell on my face in complete surrender. Awesome is too little a word to describe the love and comfort that washed over me as I lay before my God, my heavenly Father, my savior and Lord, my guide and life.
God’s Mercy and Forgiveness washed over my soul, my spirit, my body. I had never felt so light and free before. Guilt and unforgiveness weigh a ton, or tons I should say. They permit dark spirits to darken your life, and cause all manner of evil to press in on you and in through you. Like in the movie Matrix: Reloaded ©; the evil twins. Who could pass right through you as they did their dirt to you.
Well, when you cry out to God, like David did, and let go of all of your mind set and judgments, and guilt syndromes, etc., well God’s Grace, His unmerited favor floods your life, your soul. And God’s forgiveness washes all sin, judgment, blame, guilt – washes them and their dark controllers away – Away – AWAY!!! God’s forgiveness comes through the blood of His only begotten Son, Jesus. The blood of the Lamb of God, sacrificed, slain so we could ‘be’ forgiven – as is the forgiven ones.
Guess who doesn’t want us to know we are forgiven??? Right! So who you gonna choose? God or the enemy of your soul? Me, I chose GOD, Forgiveness and all !!!